literature

Heart shaped, broken hearts.

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HayleighElizabeth's avatar
Published:
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Literature Text


All I have is you and you are all I need.
You're the reason my heart is beating.
I'm lost in pain without you by my side.
It hurt's me, thinking about losing you.
Breathing slows and my mind kicks in.
I'm losing the fight, seeing you walk away.
The days that you were there to protect me.
Dread and loneliness, caught infecting me.
I'm not strong, and life is disconnecting me.


It's heart shaped hands, broken hearts.
Go on and tell the tragic story.
What can i do to improve this.
Should i add or change anything?
© 2010 - 2024 HayleighElizabeth
Comments15
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vampirevampire's avatar
Just a tiny thing: "It hurt's me, thinking about losing you."

Is the apostrophe supposed to be there, after "hurt"? Or is it just me and the lack of coffee in my house?

Nonethless, it was a nice read. The longing, the loneliness... The emotions are well worded. Keep at it!


:iconthe-writers-review:
Write. Critique. Repeat.